December 08, 2013
I feel like I have lost all hope. I feel as if I am nothing. I was at a Christmas Brunch yesterday at church and and was told I am a gift from God. I wanted to believe it. I feel in my heart I am a good person and I love God. I want to do right by him. 2 husbands and many close friends have walked away from a relationship with me over the years without giving me any reason. I don't understand. I feel so alone. I feel so hopeless. I feel worthless. I pray daily that I will die. I pray for God to take me instead of someone who is wanted and needed in this world. I am hurting so terribly. I want it to end. It hurts me to think these thoughts are hurting God. I have not talked with anyone about these feelings. I just smile and pretend to be happy. It is now so tiring to keep up this charade. I need the pain to go away. I find myself unable to trust others. I am trying to trust God and cling to him.
December 08, 2013
I am still praying for a miracle for husband's return home and family restoration. Bless each of you who have prayed or sent notes. I can see below my prayer requests where there have been notes sent but for some reason I am not receiving them. I feel all alone in the world but it helps knowing that there are those out there that who care. I pray that our Father in Heaven bless each of you with your own answered prayers. Bless you/
December 06, 2013
Praying for complete restoration & have been for close to 7 years. Praying that husband and son & even myself to have an encounter with God. I am asking God to show me what he wants me to do. My husband is living in a house with a gay man, they go to gay clubs we have been married for over 35 years and everything was good until this man came into my husband's life. Our son is angry and mad at the world, our children don[t talk, my mother is angry at the world, nothing satisfies her. I feel all alone in the world, like no one even knows I'm alive until they need something or money. I desire to know if my husband is gay & if so why wait for 40 years to live that life. Help me, Lord I need you so much and your guidance. This time of year should be a very joyful time but right now I don't feel joyful, I know that is what Satan wants I need prayer to stand up and fight him
December 06, 2013
Lord i'm going to step outside my own little world now, please let me see the bigger picture you have set aside for me-I'm tired living through my emotion/ Anxiety and Depresion-PTSD- help me live for you, God!
December 03, 2013
God Bless all of you who have been praying for me and my marriage... please continue..as I still need them so very much.. My husband walked out on our marriage after 31 years together. And along with him went his entire family who were the only family I had in this world. Now I am totally alone after 31 years. It is like everyone died. Thanksgiving was unbearable as I always had a house full of people and this year the house was silent and so very lonely. Lord, I don't understand any of this... please, please help me! The lonliness is unbearable at times. I will continue to keep putting one foot in front of the other each and every day when I wake up but would appreciate any and all prayers anyone can offer. Please Lord help me to get through this whatever Your Will may be...and also please help my husband...as he needs You too ... he needs to know that what he is doing is wrong.. Thank you so very much for taking the time to read this.. and I thank you so very much for all your prayers....thank you, thank you, thank you.