Planning to DIVORCE my husband
July 30, 2012
I don't know where to start. My husband and I are not legally married, but we are traditionally married. We have been married for 3 years now. Before we got married, we dated for 5 years. I know that God hates divorce and his only exception is infidelity. I have been so patient with my husband and his family to the point that I cannot do it anymore. His family hates me, but they act nice in front of me. My mother in law and I don't get along because she is basically like my husband's wife. She does everything for him and babys him all the time. I have done all that I can to save my marriage, and express to my husband how I feel. Although his parents are wrong and selfish and mean to me, he still sides with his parents because in our culture, you have to honor your parents. He is forsaking our marriage to honor his parents even though they are wrong. About two years ago, we moved out from our in laws place to live on our own. We have our little cozy apt, but we are in a finical crisis, so he wants to move back to his parents place. We moved out from his parents place because his parents are physical fighting all the time with each other, and they are constantly telling my husband to marry a different woman besides me. I truly believe that my in laws hate me because their son (my husband) use to obey them and do everything that they want, but ever since he met me and married me, I helped him learn more about himself and actually do things for himself too, not just doing things for his parents even though it's hurting him. For example, his parents wanted him to become a doctor, but he wanted to become a police officer. So, he went to college to become a doctor and failed, and his parents were mad at him for failing. So, now he is going back to school to become a police officer. His parents blame me that his son changed and don't obey them like he use to. Now, my husband wants to move back with his parents, and I don't want to because I know that our marriage will be in jeopardy because of his parents, but he doesn't care and he still wants to live with his parents. Considering everything that my husband and his family have put through, I want to separate from my husband at this moment. I almost lost my life in the past when we lived with my in laws because my father in law and mother in law were physically fighting. I always tell my husband to tell the church about his parents problems, but they never do. They hide it in the house, and play it nice and safe at church. I feel so miserable. I feel like my husband doesn't love me and our marriage. He is just too busy trying to please his parents. I want to leave now. I have two little brothers that need me, and I'm always neglecting them because I have to take care of my husband and his family's problems. Please pray for God to be in our lives and make a way out of all this trouble. I also want to leave my husband because from the last 3 years that we have been together, he is still the same person he is. Although he doesn't physically cheat on me, he is a very lustful, perverse person. He cheats on me through the internet and self-pleasure. He is constantly buying things behind my back, like guns and games. And that leads to him not paying the bills, so I have to pay the bills. We are in debt because we are constantly late on our bills. Even to the point where we need money for food and gas, and he still choose to use the money to buy things for himself like games. I can't live like this anymore with a boy that is so irresponsible and have no ambitions. My husband is not overly abusive, but when he is really mad, he does get pretty abusive. At that point, I leave the house until he is calm. I do live fearing that he might just one day break down and hurt me badly. There is so much more that I want to share, but you guys get the idea. I just want to leave now because there is nothing worth saving anymore. Please pray for me to be a good wife for my husband and for my husband to change. I fear for my life if we live with his family. If my husband still chooses to live with his family after knowing what his parents have done to me and our marriage, I will leave my husband for my safety and because I deserve a man that will fight for our marriage.